Apparently, Officer Captain Team America thought I was negligent of the rules of the road when I went through a yellow light at 95th and Quivira. He gave me a ticket in spite of the fact that, last I heard, going through a yellow light is not a crime. Now, according to Officer Captain Team America John Walsh Dunkin, I went through a red light. Well, we'll have to agree to disagree. In court. On August 18th at 5:30pm. Oh yeah, I'll be there, and I've got plenty of Law and Order court case viewings under my belt, so I hope you're prepared for some of the best-laid defense strategies of your life, buddy.
So, needless to say, this put me in a very non-writerly mood as I spent the rest of the night researching traffic law and proper court decorum. Which brings me to the sad realization that all my great plans may be destroyed by chance and circumstance. Add to that the stress I've imposed on myself to get it all done in five days, stress which does little to aid the writing process.
And I have to get a tb test today for nursing school. Bleh.
Back to this traffic ticket, because I am still really upset about it. I've never gotten a ticket in my life (except when I was 17, and I got that taken off my record). So, technically, I've never been given a ticket in my life. I'm a good driver - a great driver some would say (by "some" I mean me). I feel the only way to get over this is to change what happened. I'm going to do that now. Here's what happened:
Officer CTAJWD: Do you know why I pulled you over? It's because you ran that red light.
Me: I know. (literally, that's what I said. I was sooooo pissed).
Officer: Well, you know, the roads are wet and that was dangerous, so... I don't know why you ran a red light with a cop right behind you. Not really smart.
Me: I agree.
Officer: Okay, well, sit tight. I'll be right back.
And then he leaves to write me a ticket. Uuuuugh, it makes me so mad. Here's the new version of what happened:
Officer: You know why I pulled you over?
Me: No, but I'm pretty sure you're gonna tell me.
Officer: It's because you ran a red light.
Me: Actually, I'm positive that I didn't run a red light.
Officer: Well, you know, the roads are wet and that was dangerous, so...
Me: Actually, the fact that the roads are wet is why I did not attempt to stop for the yellow light. I had no desire to slam on my breaks and hydroplane into the intersection, potentially causing a crash that would have been a lot more dangerous than just clearing the intersection before the light turned red.
Officer: I don't know why you ran a red light with a cop behind you. Not really smart.
Me: You know what's not really smart? Whatever mental road map your brain follows that would lead you to think anyone would intentionally break the law when they know full well there's a cop behind them. Seriously, what would make you think that? Do you think people in general are that stupid, or are you just referring to me? Is this a sex thing? I'm stupid because I'm a girl? Because I look like I'm 21? Every 21 year old girl is a moron, is that it?
Officer: Okay, well, sit tight. I'll be right back.
So, in this reality, I still get the ticket, but at least I didn't let my pissed-of-edness get the better of my rapier wit! Can't wait until I see this guy again in court. I will destroy him!
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