Friday, March 14, 2008

Kindly Rejection

I must make a note here that Miriam Altshuler of Miriam Altshuler Literary Agency has sent me the kindest rejection letter that I ever expect to receive. She called me a "talented" and "humorous" writer, and I am very surprised and warmed by the fact that she took time out to reject me in a proper and respectful way. Someday, I would like to work with this woman.

Back On Track

I will admit, I took a little detour there for a few weeks. But, finding that the road of self-pity and over-eating is a sad and lonely one, I have returned with new resolve and a spirit of irrational determination. Yesterday I unleashed a veritable blitz of Query letters, six in one day, and I feel all the accomplishment that certain, yet postponed rejection can possibly allow. I will not be silenced. I refuse all the fleeting emotions of apathy and defeat, and instead I willingly accept the victory I know is hiding somewhere behind all this mess of No's.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Failure Deferred

I give up. I mean really, how much longer am I expected to withstand this constant bludgeoning to my self-esteem? This violent deference, from which I am supposed to glean some kind of constructive criticism. Just as the burning amber of my hope is fanned into a small flame by some show of interest, it is subsequently dowsed with gallons and gallons of icy cold water - snuffed out without any hint of a rekindle (Miriam Altshuler, you broke my heart). Granted, I have only officially received three rejections, but the fourth is on its way, and already, at this very early stage, I almost want to throw my hands up and go back to a life of ambiguity (or return to my life of ambiguity, rather). I know I have to press on, not because anyone is counting on me, but because I can't stand the thought of not succeeding, and as long as I am still engaged in this futile effort, as hopeless as it may be, I have still managed to defer failure.